Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Bringing joy to the world through a lemon poppyseed muffin

I participated in a very scientific experience this past week - I ate an incredible amount of poppyseeds in order to see if I'd really fail a urine analysis. It all started last Tuesday when I was talking about these great salads I really like at my social work internship. The salad has poppyseed dressing on it and we started debating whether or not poppyseeds really do make you fail a drug test. It's one of those things no one really knows for sure, but everyone wonders. I decided to take matters into my own hands and conduct an experiment.

For the past week I've incorporated poppyseeds into just about every meal. I ate salads with poppyseed dressing, made lemon poppyseed muffins, ate poppyseed rolls, and even bought a little container of poppyseeds and sprinkled them on everything I ate. Everything from toast to quesadillas to even my tea! Actually, I didn't put them in my tea, I can thank my friends for that. Also, I don't even like poppyseeds, they taste bad, but I had to forge on for science.

Today I did the UA at my internship. I'm at a drug treatment facility so I have easy access to them and the workers there wanted to know the results too. I'm happy to say that I came up negative. For both opiates and cocaine. The monitor who administrated the UA kept saying that she thought it would mess up the cocaine test but I kept insisting it would for opiates so we did both. Actually, I'm not going to lie, I'm disappointed. I have never had a UA before and I thought it would have been hilarious if I failed my first one. I think the monitor thought I was so weird for doing this, plus I kept going off about how it was my first time. But then again she was more than eager to help me with the whole process.

So now you know, you can eat all the poppyseeds you want and you won't fail your drug test. That's just a myth and I busted it.


Cecilia said...

I like lemon poppy seed muffins, but sometimes the poppyseeds get stuck in your teeth. That's no good.

erin said...

Golda! I think you should try it again. Eric and I were discussing this tonight at his house, and his dad said that (and his mom agreed) the poppy seeds need to be crushed, otherwise they pass through your system intact. You should grind up a massive week's worth of poppy seeds and see if you can't successfully fail a drug test that way.

Golda said...

Good to know! I'll have to crush them and retest myself! I should be able to this Tuesday. I hope that's enough time.